RHOA Recap: Ghetto Fabulous Wedding
We picked up where we left off, which was NeNe getting turnt after her fight with Porsha. All the ladies had to hold her fat ass back before she left in a puff of smoke and had Kandi, Cynthia, Kenya and Marlo follow her. Did they even get to eat? You know Kandi would be mad about that. After the Sisterhood of the Travelling Weaves left, Porsha was stuck at the table fake crying with her only "friend" Sheree. Did y'all even see one tear come out of Porsha's eye?
Bravo gave us that juxtaposition between the two groups bitching about the other which is always good TV. Porsha said that the other four girls just want to break her down. Bitch, didn't you try to break Kandi down when you spent a year saying she wanted to drug and rape you? Take several seats with your lopsided booty. At the same time, NeNe explained why she got SO turnt, which was because she never tried to get her fired, she shared her opinion of who should go but never tried to cost Porsha her check. Let's get that straight.
Tensions reached an all time high but the ladies woke up nice and early the next morning to try and promote San Francisco the best the could, you know the trips are just a 40 minute infomercial. NeNe greeted everyone with a hug in the morning and gave Streetfighter Porsha a shady wave.
The divas loaded onto a San Fran trolley and Kenya talked about her grandma's funeral which set something of in Porsha and caused her to cry, real tears this time. Cynthia talked to her and shared that NeNe bashed her on WWHL as well, but they got through it. Doesn't everybody shade everybody on that show? Isn't that why they invented WWHL, or Bravo for that matter?
The gang split up with NeNe, Kandi, Kenya and Cynthia exploring Fisherman's Wharf and Sheree, Porsha and Marlo going down to Chinatown. Maybe Miss P can find herself a new Chinese boo? The girls decided to throw Kenya a wedding because they weren't invited to the first one, which is the shadiest thing ever. You know Marlo is working for that check.
While half the ladies bought things for Kenya's fake wedding, the other half discussed Sheree's shady new prison boo. That was some serious tea that she just spilled all over their laps. NeNe shared that Tyrone is a con artist and that's why he's locked up. Kandi said that she hopes he doesn't con her out of Chateau Sheree, but Kenya never one to pass up a Chateau shade opportunity, pointed out that the house isn't in her name. Who knows, maybe it's in Tyrone's name.
After the ladies spent their day running around San Fran, they got ready for Kenya's Ghetto Fabulous Wedding. The girls bought a cardboard husband, Porsha rounded up some gays, Kandi got her singing voice on and the ladies called down Cynthia and Kenya to surprise them with this very shady event. Kenya gleamed with all the attention being on her and married Flat Marc while Porsha failed her only job of keeping him up right. SMH. Once the wedding of the century was done, Porsha pulled Kandi aside and gave her the worst apology ever. Ugh really? Porsha called her a rapist on national TV, you don't forgive for that, you file a defamation suit and keep it moving.
For the ladies last day in San Fran they donned their hottest fashions and headed up to the Napa Valley with Flat Marc in tow. The mess of this show. After they got off the bus, they loaded onto a train and Kandi couldn't miss the chance to throw some shade Porsha's way over the underground railroad mess. That will never get old. While on the train Porsha got stuck with Kandi and Kenya, but the all played nice while Kenya bragged about her (maybe controlling) husband. Something is going on in that relationship.
The other girls called Kandi over to talk about Porsha's apology the night before and they were talking about her LITERALLY behind her back. She would of had to be hearing them word for word while she was pretending to listen to Kenya ramble on about Marc. I just want to see him on camera once to see how he treats Miss Twirl, because something tells me that he would shut down her mess real quick.
Finally the ATL ladies arrived at their destination and were greeted by a very kinky wine guy who got Porsha to pop his cork and then fed grapes to all the single girls. He dropped the bomb that he was married which Porsha (pretended) to bother her, but you know that Marlo was not phased one bit. The girls also went grape stomping which is so gross because no one wants to drink their toe juice. Maybe Jax Taylor.
Miss Moore-Daly left the trip early to fly to her grandma's funeral and left the girls to have one last shady dinner and the vineyard with Flat Marc still at the table. I wonder who took him home? My bet is on Marlo. Kandi spilled the tea that Todd wanted to pop in on Marc's restaurant while they were in New York which got everyone talking about if she's really married. Cynthia got sensitive because she didn't want the girls to bash her friend and walked out of room the table when Marlo made the girls vote on who thinks Twirl is really married. Only Kandi raised her hand! M-E-S-S!
NeNe and her wig had to get up and bring Miss Bailey back to the table where she shared that she was upset that she never got an invite to the real wedding but she stands by her friend. It was a nice change to see Cynthia get heated and stand up for that she thinks. Finally, she's a REAL housewife of Atlanta!
The Real Housewives of Atlanta airs Sunday at 8/7c on Bravo! Stay tuned at Good Tea for our shady recaps and exclusive tea on our favourite Georgia peaches.