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Shade of the Week: Scott Disick & Sofia Richie

Doesn't the thirst of this relationship shade itself?

Ever since Scott Disick and Sofia Richie got together back in September this odd couple has been fifty shades of shadeworthy. Whether it's their considerable age difference, how she looks like a Mini Khloe, the fact he has three kids, their excessive PDA or that she was actually friends with Kourtney Kardashian's boyfriend Younes Bendjima before either of these relationship's started, there were a lot of things to shit on them for and I'm surprised it took me nine months into this mess box of a relationship to assign them to my honourable Shade of the Week.

Earlier this week, Lord Disick was spotted drunkenly flirting with a girl in Wyoming which pushed someone in the Richie camp over the edge because a PA or maybe even Lionel himself gave Us Weekly all the mother fucking tea on his daughter's relationship with the reality star turned cokehead turned Jesus wannabe. Actually, it was probably Nicole Richie who sold the story if I'm honest. Apparently Scott previously cheated on Sofia in Miami which caused Lionel to "forbid" their relationship and threatened to CUT HER OUT OF THE WILL if she went back. Little girl, no dick is that good to miss out on the Say You Say Me money. Lionel must really hate Scott if he's willing to pull a Candy Spelling on his own daughter's ass, or maybe he knew the talk of money would snap her right into focus - but obviously it hasn't.

The barely legal wannabe THOT has proclaimed her love on social media for Scott and he claimed to never know they even broke up after the cheating allegations. Maybe they took a break? Maybe Lionel forced her to but she couldn't go through with it? Or maybe she wants to be the next Kourtney Kardashian and take him back whenever he makes a bad mistake, she already has the brown hair! For all we know this tea could all be fake news but with Scott, where there's smoke there's fire and if he was with his baby mama for 10 years and still never fell into line, I doubt a 19-year-old trust fund baby could make him the model citizen he should be. He's just so sloppy, I have no idea how anyone could actually pursue a relationship with him because from KUWTK we all know he likes to disappear for three days without telling anyone and go on benders, but maybe Sofia is stupid enough to go on those benders with him? This relationship is perfect for him because he's still growing up and is probably mentally 19 at this point in his life.

If Scott did in fact cheat on Sofia (we all know he did, but let's pretend for a moment) it obviously isn't the most surprising thing ever given his track history. After studying the Lord for a decade on reality TV, we all know he is a self-sabotager and he loves to fuck up relationships in his life so that we can play the victim and get down on himself so that everyone feels sorry for him - even though he is the whole reason for causing the mess. He's a master manipulator and probably needs to be on the second season of Celebrity Big Brother, we all know he needs the check!

When their relationship started I think Scott thought it would be a quick pump and dump but then actually got feelings for this girl and saw Kourt happier with a younger guy which probably pushed him to stay with Sofia for comfort, stability and to try and make his ex jealous in the back of his mind. She met the kids, he met the Richies, they travelled all over the world and after nine months all these things probably caught up with him where he went "Fuck" and decided to cheat to play his usual victim game like he always does. We have seen this pattern FOR YEARS and I refuse to believe that it stopped just because he's no longer on reality TV.

Cheating is horrible but she knew what she was getting involved in and if she stays that will only enable his asshole behaviour. This relationship isn't going anywhere and Sofia is young enough and dumb enough to stay in this toxic relationship, so that when she's of legal drinking age and wakes up from his magic spell, she'll know what she really deserves in a relationship. That's a message to everyone: date assholes young so that you know how much you are worth and what you deserve for the future. Did I just make a teachable moment out of this messy relationship? I couldn't give a shit if Sofia stays with Scott's cheating ass or not but if I was her I would be making sure that my name was still in Lionel's will and that my Amex was still working because if she misses out on that money then we've got ourselves another Tori Spelling - AND THAT would be a Shade of the Week in itself.

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