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Shade of the Week: JD Madison

Another Creepy Cunt Club member accused of being a Creepy Cunt.

The tea of JD Madison raping (and drugging) a woman isn't surprising that it happened, it's surprising he actually got called out on his disgusting behaviour. If he is going around pulling a Pill Cosby on one girl I'm sure he's done it to A LOT more because popping pills in girls drinks are the actions of an experienced sexual offender and he would have a laundry list of unconscious hookups. Allegedly. Can we take a moment to imagine being the girl, consensual or not, with that big sweaty sperm whale on top of you and his gherkin sized dick. Whether there's proof of him sexually assaulting women or not, something we all know is that John David Madison's penis is the size of a chess piece. Put a chess piece up inside you and see how much fun you have.

From the moment JD, his whiskey drinking ways and disgusting cackle turned up on the Southern Charm scene as Thomas Ravenel's sidekick he immediately embodied everything that is wrong with the good 'ole south but as T-Rape's sidekick, it would be weird if he didn't. His attitudes towards woman, his alcoholic face, fake nice voice and numerous shady business deals are all more than perfect examples of why JD is not only one of the grossest people to look at on our Bravo screens but also one of the most internally bad too. And I'm including Housewives in that ranking. That's right he's worse than Victoria Gunvalson and her latest face.

He clearly cheats on his wife and fakes their "good" relationship for the cameras which no one buys. JD is also not the most exciting person in the world or he would've got more screen time than just cackling like a Disney villain in the background and being called out by Naomie so it wouldn't be surprising or terrible if he didn't return. Can you imagine appearing on a show in the background for years and having that make you just "famous" enough to have a sex scandal be public? Sucks for him. With Thomas being fired from the show for similar shitty ways, it doesn't make sense why JD would be around WITHOUT him anyway and if you are going to fire one cast member for raping women then you have to keep a precedent and fire another one for raping and drugging women because premeditated abuse is one step above.

What kind of sick deluded person wants to have sex with an unconscious person anyway? That's on the same playing field as people who fuck the dead. With my rational train of thought it's unclear to me why someone would want their penis surrounded by someone who cannot respond but I'm not a rapist so I guess I'll never know. As much as it may be a low self-esteem thing of not believing (and rightfully so) women would want to have sex with you, it's more about the power dominance, especially for white middle aged males because they are the most oppressed people in America and they need to forcibly rape women to make them feel good about themselves after they've been the long-suffering victims of systematic racism and prejudice. If you can't tell I'm being sarcastic then get the fuck off this page right now.

Maybe he did it because he loves rape but thought she'd forget and get away with it? I don't know but when you start the night popping shit in other people's drinks that's a calculated, experienced rapist move. Just as Pill Cosby.

The ONLY thing which could make drugging and raping a woman any worse is that the only reason JD stopped was because he was getting a call from his wife Liz. If that doesn't make you want to choke on your own vomit I don't know what will. Someone screaming for help or, you know, being unconscious won't make you stop having sex with them. No. When your wife calls to ask why you're late to pick up your son from school is when you decide to remove your pinky dick from the women you aren't supposed to have sex with to answer the phone. How does one even have a conversation with your WIFE when you've just been inside an unconscious woman moments earlier? The whole situation is giving me goosebumps.

Liz, oh, Liz. Who hurt you? JD, obviously but there's something behind her internally sad helpless behaviour on the show. She is the quintessential battered wife, she tells her friends how horrible her husband is behind the scenes then calls them liars when they tried to help her and defends her husband in public. Just a message to anyone who does that: no one believes you. We know you are lying and we lose respect for you more than anyone else. This isn't shade to Liz because she's obviously a victim of some kind of abusive relationship after being married to JD for so long and she's not ready to talk about or acknowledge his disgusting behaviour in public, however, her standing by and defending her sperm whale of a husband just enables him to keep doing what he's doing.

As of now, he hasn't been charged and the police report was only filed. Do I think he should be charged? Fuck yes. Do I think he will? Fuck no. Not only are white privileged men protected by the good 'ole boys club but it is SO hard to prove a sexual assault occurred even if the person you accuse already has a rapey vibe which everyone can see from watching any previous Southern Charm episode. I hope the victim and any other unknown ones get the justice they deserve but in the world, we live in we've come so far but got so much longer to go.

The least we can hope is that this makes JD reevaluate his decision to rape women so no one else has to go through having the sperm whale flop on top of them, however, the good thing is that he may never be found guilty or even charged but in the court of public opinion he's already guilty. For his social status, career and relationships with people with a brain who can see that sexual assault is not a good thing, that's arguably just as a good punishment because these allegations will follow him forever whether he's charged or not.

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