RHOC Season 13 Reunion Fashion Roundup!
Who plans these OC reunions? Most other shows on Bravo seem to have a theme for their reunions and the cast members look cohesive as they're fighting on the couches, but this reunion is a mess. Not as messy as the Potomac reunion, but close. The difference is all these girls look good, their hair, makeup and dresses are all great but its like they're all attending six different events. And what the fuck is the set? Are they trying to recreate Vicki's Coto de Caza mansion? Gina's sad casita? What is it? Check out our ranking of the reunion looks below:
6. Tamra Judge
I love the Queen of Telephone and she looks amazing but this look confuses me. While her hair and makeup look perfect the dress seems to be having an identity crisis. The sleeves are long but the bottom is very short and flicks up in a weird way, it looks like it's trying to be futuristic and super modern but floral and feminine at the same time. It just doesn't seem like a reunion dress, where does one even wear this? A stripper's funeral? I like the look but Tamra definitely could've done better and she's gonna have to be on snatch guard all day while she's sitting in this short dress.
5. Gina Kirschenheiter
What the fuck? Where did Gina think she was going looking like this, Studio 54? She looks great but they really need to give these girls a theme because she looks like she's about to hit some lines with John Travolta in Saturday Night Fever. This dress is more confusing than her divorce with the shimmering pattern and kaleidoscope of colours, there's just a lot going on and it's taking a while for my eyes to adjust. I like her hair though, she looks like a gay lion in the 70s, but seriously, do these girls not account for the fact they will have to be sitting down all day? Everybody on the left couch needs a snatch guard and Lu's in New York.
4. Emily Simpson
Tamra's going to a stripper's funeral, Gina's going to Studio 54 and Emily looks like she's attending her grandmother's birthday. She looks great in this green dress but it reminds me of a cheap bridesmaids dress you have to wear when the bride doesn't want to be upstaged. There's just not a lot happening with this look, it's very plain, basic and would be the perfect thing to wear with rich bitches having brunch on a Sunday at some fancy hotel. Emily's hair and makeup are fantastic and the dress clings to her body in all the right places, however, she has an amazing figure and she should've shown it off more. Better luck next year, I hope.
3. Vicki Gunvalson
We all know how I feel about Vicki but she delivered at this reunion. Okay, she didn't fully deliver with this look but she almost got the pizza to the door. The emerald green looks amazing on the OG of the OC and makes her body look great. It's the perfect amount of slutty and conservative with the cutout under her boob but is still appropriate for a grandma to wear. It's basically Vicki if she were a dress, she can whoop it up and still attend an elegant cocktail party. Normally Vicki's reunion looks are very hit and miss, however, I think she definitely came through with this one, even if she does look like Meghan King Edmonds Sr.
2. Shannon Beador
Yes, bitch. Although Shannon had an annoying cloud of sadness following her around for the majority of the season she looks stunning in this navy dress. I don't know if Shannon is wearing four pairs of Spanx or if she has just lost some LBs but she looks great in this tight number and the colour matches perfectly with her blonde hair which is the perfect shade and length. Shannon looked like a hot mess this season but she is coming through in this reunion look and I love the peacock sleeve. I can't even fault this look. She's having a shitty season and an even shitter divorce so she may as well win at something.
1. Kelly Dodd
When I initially saw Kelly's outfit I hated it but after further examination, it's my favourite of the bunch. She looks like a slutty cougar who's ready to patrol Newport Beach for hot 20 somethings with abs and have a nooner with her pool boy. Red definitely suits Kelly because psychologically it makes people want to eat more which definitely seems like one of her aims for male suitors. The red lip matches with her ensemble and her new highlights and bangs compliment her very filled up face. Kelly is another one who obviously didn't think of flashing her vagina in this very short dress but maybe that was her plan? I guess that's the risk you run when you look like a slutty superhero.
The Real Housewives of Orange County airs Sunday at 9/8c on Bravo! Stay tuned at Good Tea for our exclusive tea and shady recaps on the first ladies of Bravo.